A Lot on my Mind

People at work, friends and family are constantly asking me how I'm feeling. I always tell them good because physically I feel good (except for the back pain). But, mentally is a different answer these days. If I was being honest, I'd say I am filled with anxiety. I'm nervous about the whole labor and delivery process for many reasons. What if Rob is out of town and I have to call an ambulance to get to the hospital? What kind of pain will I be dealing with? (I really don't want an answer to that one!). Are the things I read about in the books going to happen? What if they find something wrong with Preston when he's born? These questions constantly clutter my mind. Then I go on to....if all goes well with the delivery then what? Can we provide him with everything he NEEDS? Will I be a good mom or screw him up somewhere along the way? What if I drop him or he falls down the stairs? Can you see why I am filled with anxiety? Being a parent is the biggest responsibility known to mankind as far as I'm concerned. Right now, Preston is safe (except for me being clumsy) and I'm bonding with him on familiar territory. I know what makes him kick/move and what calms him down. I know when to expect him to move and what foods or drinks will set him off. I know he's getting plenty of nutrients and has life good right now. So, I am nervous to experience what life will be like once he's left the womb. It's a scary learning process but I'm sure we'll do fine because we have such a loving support network of family and friends. So, now I can go to bed and sleep away my worries and concerns...at least for tonight!