Sunday, August 30, 2015

JenniferJ Photography Website

You know how they say it takes a village to raise a child? Well, I feel it took a village to create my business website but it's now 98% done. I just need to tweak a couple small things but for the most part it's done and I'm thrilled. If you have a free minute, please go check it out....
www.jenniferjphotographs.com

Saturday, August 22, 2015

My Walking Miracle

Six years ago my thoughts were consumed with whether my son would live or if he'd have brain damage. All because of an illness contracted as a newborn. Now I rarely think about that time. When I do, it's to say a quick "thanks" to God for the miracles He provided in our son's life. Today he asked to go to the library. I was thrilled but asked why he'd want to go to the library on his day off. He said, "Because I love to read and learn new words. I love learning and books help me learn new things like life cycles and plants and community helpers." I almost teared up because it took me back in time to when I worried non-stop, 24/7 whether he'd be okay later in life, whether he'd have significant brain damage. Not only is he okay, but as Rob says, "He's wickedly smart with an imagination beyond his years." By the time we got to the library I was lost in thought, thinking about how blessed we are to have him in our lives. He adds so much compassion, humor, knowledge and creativity to our family. Today alone I think he hugged me about a dozen times and was quick to tell me I'm the best mom in the world because I take him and E on adventures instead of doing work. (After our adventure I did have to do some work though.) I need to thank God more for the miracle both of our boys are in our lives. They both have their own individual stories. They both have their strengths and weaknesses but they sure make my life complete and I am so glad for the blessing they are to so many.

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Moody Weather

What is it about the weather that can affect one's mood so much? Without even seeing the forecast, you could probably tell it's been overcast and raining the past few days just by talking to me. I have been unmotivated, grumpy and generally in a blah mood because of the weather. I've heard that you get wiser with age and, while I don't generally agree with that (I've found that the older I get the more I realize I don't know), one thing I have learned is how the weather can affect my mood. While sunshine can make me happy and motivated, humidity makes me downright irritable. Snow has a calming affect on me (unless I'm driving on Hwy 395 during rush hour~ and I use the term "rush hour" loosely) but rain makes me unmotivated and tired. Some wind and cold temperatures on a Bluebird Day make me downright giddy! Yes, there have been many days where I've been happy when it's raining and unmotivated when it's sunny but I still find it weird how something as simple as weather can make a break your mood for the day. Hopefully the sun will come out soon and I'll break out of this funk because my "To Do" list doesn't seem to be getting done on it's own!

Thursday, August 13, 2015

Oh, The Guilt

I think the word "mommy" is synonymous with the word "guilt". I've always been a person that has a guilty conscience even when I haven't done anything wrong. But becoming a mom has made it 1000x worse. Truthfully, though, there aren't many moms that don't feel guilty about things. For me, I feel guilty a couple dozen times a day. I feel guilty....
* when I don't play with E every time he asks me to.
* when I take a client phone call when I'm grocery shopping or at the park because then I can't give my client the attention they deserve.
* when I tell E I can't take him to the park because there's too much to do.
* when the house is filthy because I spend too much time playing with the boys.
* when I read a cheesy romance during E's naptime. (But I don't feel guilty taking a nap with him, which I do a couple times a week)
* when I can't arrange my schedule to volunteer in P's class.
* when I answer emails or pay bills during carpool instead of singing songs or telling E stories.
* when P gets elaborate birthdays (including gifts) but E gets overlooked because he was born 5 days after Christmas and~ heaven forbid~ during the rut.
* when we stopped doing nightly devotions with P and haven't started back up.
* when I don't do crafts with the boys.
* when P gets all the new stuff and E gets all the hand me downs.
* when I don't use a teachable moment to teach them a lesson.
* when the boys eat too much processed food and/or sugar.
* when I don't take the time to figure out what E is trying to say.
* when I allow the TV or technology to "babysit" my boys for an hour.
* when I realize that P took swim, gymnastics and soccer lessons by age 3,  and was a part of Gymboree and weekly playgroups but E has never done any formal lessons/classes and rarely has play dates.
* when I don't teach the boys more Bible verses.
* when I do work after the boys are in bed instead of spending time with Rob.
* when I.......

OK, you get the point. I feel a lot of guilt in one day. Although I've bared my soul about my inner mommy guilt I will conclude by saying that, to me anyway, guilt and worry are 2 different things. I don't worry that these things will affect my boys too much ten years down the road (except the Biblical knowledge).  I feel guilty but I don't let it keep me up at night. I know that in Matthew 6 the Lord commands us not to worry and thankfully there are only 4 things I worry about. 1 only directly relates to my oldest and that's about his behavior at school or when I'm not around him. But even these 4 things are not things I stew about on a regular basis.
In closing, I'd like to say that if you are a mom who can relate to the guilt you are not alone. Whether your child is young or old, you'll probably always have some degree of guilt. But, I saw something on Facebook yesterday that I thought held a lot of truth....."Don't compare yourself with other moms. We're all a hot mess. Some just hide it better than others." So don't beat yourself up if you're not winning the "Mom of the Year" award. It's the nature of motherhood and just keep doing the best you can....without feeling guilty about the things you aren't doing. :)

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

I Am.

Last night, Rob and I were talking about what encompasses us and how it's easy for people to conform to the people they're around. So, while I was scrubbing baseboards and walls this morning it gave me time to reflect on who I am.
First and foremost, I am a child of God....a daughter He created in His likeness. Then I am a wife, a mom, a daughter, a sister and a friend. Unfortunately, sometimes I mix up the priorities of each of those roles but I still know that that is who I am.
But I also wear many other hats so to speak. And some day when I die, I don't want people to just say "She was a hard worker." or "She was an honest person." or "She was kind." In fact, I would take that as an insult. I want people to know that there is so much to me that those comments are just a given because they encompass so much more.
I am..... a photographer. A teacher. A crafter. A spot n stalk hunter (not to be mistaken for a tree stand hunter). A runner. A girl who loves ball caps and jeans but can feel just as good in heels and make up. A sports participant but not an athlete. A cuddler. A sappy romantic. A cook, but not a chef. A blogger. A hiker. A person who tries to be PC but is not afraid to tell it like it is. A small business owner. A reader. A busy bee who is trying to learn how to take time for the small things in life. A camper. A nature lover (but not a reptile lover). A communicator.
There is so much more to me than a small blog list. There is depth. There are flaws. There are strengths and weaknesses. Because I am who I am...a person with many interests and responsibilities. I want my life to be looked at as more than just a wife and a mom because sometimes I think it's easy for SAHMs to view themselves that way~only having 2 roles in life. But there is so much more to me and I hope others see that because...I am.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

All Good Things....

I'm not ready to say goodbye to Summer. Whereas some moms/dads can't wait for school to start so their kids are busy and/or not at home most of the day, I'll be sad come the first day of school. It's been a great Summer full of adventures!
At the beginning of Summer I bought a huge poster board so P could write out his Summer Bucket List. I'm happy to say that he has checked everything off of it as he says goodbye to Summer and hello to a new school year. Everything has been done from water fights to fishing to bowling to swimming to the zoo to the bounce places to beaches to his birthday to trips out of state and everything in between. I think he only said, "I'm bored" once his entire break. I could post 100 pics and it still wouldn't do our Summer justice but here are just a few to get a taste of the adventures we had.....