Mother of 2

Today I'm taking it easy. Partly because, at my check up yesterday, my dr got on me for overdoing it too soon after major surgery. Partly because I did too much yesterday and didn't get much sleep last night so I'm listening to my body. It's hard being a mother of 2. I have yet-as a mother for 2 for the past 2 weeks-to find the balance between giving both boys the attention they need. I constantly beat myself up over not holding Easton enough or not playing with P enough. Yesterday was like that. I was constantly torn and went to bed in tears because I felt like the only time I paid attention to P was to get on him about stuff. I felt like the only time I held Easton was to nurse him. It took everything in my power not to curl up with P in his bed, loving on him like I should've been doing all day. Or to not put Easton in bed with us because he was having a hard time adjusting to his new co-sleeper (even though I had my hand resting on him most of the night so he knew I was close by).
Between Easton not sleeping well and the dogs getting into a knock down drag out fight in the garage, I didn't get much sleep. I woke up even more tired than when I had gone to bed. Then the morning started with dog poop all over the garage and P screaming bloody murder when I took him to school. But, like I told Rob and my mother in law, I'd rather have a rough day like this with my boys than a great day of teaching. I'm doing exactly what I've wanted to do and, even on the hard days, I'm happy staying at home with my 2 wonderful boys. I'll learn the balance soon enough and have been told it gets easier. Now if only I could get some much needed sleep. Zzzzzzzzzz......................