Some people are in the habit of exercising while others are in the habit of stopping by their favorite drive thru on the way home from work. Some people are in the habit of saving money while others are in the habit of spending money. Some people are in the habit of staying up late while others are in the habit of going to bed early. Some people are in the habit of making work a priority while others are in the habit of making family a priority. Everyone has habits. Some habits are good and some not so much. Such is life....until those habits affect those around you.
In marriage, it's easy to see habits~ both good and bad. Habits such as leaving love notes or telling your spouse you love him or her several times a day. Habits like not communicating and not laughing together. It's not until you've gotten into such a bad habit that you realize how damaging it has become. Recently, Rob and I were given advice from someone we respect about how to communicate better. It was a simple structural change but it has made all the difference in our communication and ultimately our marriage. We went from hardly saying more than a dozen sentences to each other throughout the day to talking for hours in a day. We hardly run out of things to talk about now, even on the weekends, which in the past has been difficult for us.
I know that not all marriage issues are based on bad habits. I realized this recently while I was having lunch with someone who I hold near and dear to my heart and the person was confiding in me about their marriage. Some marriages need a change of heart and a big miracle from God. I get it.
All marriages need prayer but when we see our marriages struggling because of bad habits it's time to get advice, intervention, mentoring, whatever you want to call it. Because marriage is worth saving, worth fighting for. Breaking bad habits or digging into the deeper root of problems can make all the difference. I should know. Just look at our marriage!
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