Socially Awkward

I have always been a social butterfly. My elementary school report cards even say so. But as I have gotten older I have changed. I still like getting together with friends. But I prefer a handful of friends getting together rather than going to a large party. I guess it's because, over the course of the past year or so, I have realized how socially awkward I have become. The filter doesn't always work from my brain to my mouth and I say really dumb stuff. Or I don't pay attention to who is around me and say something that I immediately regret. Or I'm not fully listening to the conversation and give an odd response to the conversation at hand. One thing that is difficult for me is accepting compliments. Before Rob and I got married, I had a roommate that used to say, "When someone compliments you, just say 'Thank you' and let it be." It's hard for me to do it, like I am not worthy of a compliment. The other night a co-worker/friend gave me a compliment about teaching. Instead of just saying "Thank you", I immediately listed my credentials for her. Who cares what grades I've taught? It was nice that she noticed my ability to teach multiple grades and I should've just accepted her compliment for what it was.
Last night I had my staff Christmas party. I know most of the staff by now but I was still nervous about saying the wrong thing. Of course, I put my foot in my mouth twice while my principal was within earshot. Rob said not to worry about it but that's stuff I overanalyze to death.
Because of things like this, large social settings can make me nervous. I worry too much about what people think about me and I already know I talk too much (thanks to my youth pastor's wife from my teen years). So I have prayed about it and do my best to think before I speak. Most of the time, when I'm in a large social setting, I just clam up so I don't say the wrong thing or talk too much. I've come to accept this though because I've prayed about it and have tried to learn from different situations. I can only do what I can do. I'm human.
But I make no guarantees the older I get. One of these days I'll be one of those old ladies that offends everyone with my opinions. Such is life.....HA!