I look at our boys on a daily basis, thankful for the age they are at. I didn't like the newborn phase. I liked the toddler years okay. But, I LOVE this age they are both at now. When they were younger, our oldest was definitely a mama's boy and our youngest couldn't get enough of his daddy's attention. I remember complaining to Rob, saying that I wanted E to cherish me as much as he cherished Rob. And Rob would tell me that, as they grow, things will shift. There will be times I'll be closer to P and times I'll be close to E. I didn't believe him.
Now I do. E and I have formed a bond over the past several months like none we've had before. I am the one he comes to when he is scared or anxious about something. He likes to cuddle with me when we're watching a family movie. He chooses to ride in the car with me instead of Rob (but who wouldn't make that same choice?? HA!).
It's not that P and I aren't close right now. In fact, I am extremely thankful that we have the type of relationship we do. He is very open with me (and Rob) and asks questions because he knows we'll give him answers. He has his first girlfriend and he asks a lot of relationship/boy-girl questions. Sometimes we discuss something in depth. Other times the answer is, "That's information that you don't need right now but we will tell you when we think you are ready." And he accepts that because he trusts that we know best. Recently he asked to go to a concert with a friend of his that we didn't know. Rob and I both stood firm and told him no, stating our reasons why. On Friday I found out a little more about the kid's family life and was glad we had told P no. Another reason why I feel we are close is that we respect that he's at an awkward phase in life. There are times he holes up in his room and acts like a teenager. There are other times he gives us big bear hugs and tells us how much he loves us or cuddles with us on the couch while we watch TV. We belly laugh about silly things, but talk in depth about serious things. I validate his feelings when needed because I remember how this is an awkward age. But, through it all, we give him space to figure it all out right now. We don't push him to act a certain way and I think he appreciates that.
P is closer with Rob right now. They have a lot of father/son time in which they have conversations that I don't need to be a part of. I am not jealous of their relationship the way I was with E and Rob a few years ago. Why? Because I appreciate that Rob is there for him, guiding him and teaching him life lessons. I appreciate that P chooses his dad over me because for many years that wasn't the case.
I am glad Rob was right. I am glad that we have our unique time with each boy. When E is at baseball academy, we have special time with P. When P is at youth group, we have special time with E. Lately, that has become a date night for me and E, something I thoroughly enjoy. I don't take for granted the time we spend together, as a family or on an individual basis. P made a comment yesterday that he'll be out of the house in 5 1/2 years. It doesn't seem possible but you better believe I'm going to enjoy every last minute of it and will cherish the memories when he does indeed spread his wings and fly. We are blessed and I am thankful that God has given me the life He has!
No comments:
Post a Comment