Insomnia Blog

 I’ve been awake for over 24 hours and, despite being sleep deprived, I feel like I could run a marathon right now. I got a steroid injection yesterday due to an allergic reaction to poison ivy and it has me WIRED. So, hold on, because this blog post may be my post random one yet…full of lots of typos.

A couple weeks ago (maybe even three weeks?), I closed out another school year. I’m not gonna lie and say it was an easy one…as a teacher or as a parent. But, it was still hard to say goodbye to another group of students. This group was a challenge. BUT, they were also a group that matured more in one year than any other group I’ve taught. Several of them went from having behavior issues to becoming natural leaders among their peers. They also grew leaps and bounds academically, which is saying a lot because they are already a very smart group. But, they were ready to move onto Jr High and I was ready for the lazy mornings of Summer break. So hugs were given, certificates were handed out and my classroom was packed up….

Summer break has not been as busy as usual, but has still kept us hopping. We started the break by going to a family farm in Alabama for Memorial Day weekend. We LOVE going there, spending time with Uncle Fred, eating good food and fishing from sun up to sun down. Over the course of about 36 hours at the farm, we caught over 100 fish! Some of them were giants, too! It was a great way to start out break.

We added a few additions to the family at the start of Summer. We adopted a bloodhound puppy, Rip. He is quite a needy little booger that keeps us laughing with his clumsiness and droopy ears. He does not replace Fetcha in any way, shape or form but he has helped with relieve the big loss we were feeling after her sudden death. He’s been a good addition to our family. We also added 2 more chickens because who doesn’t need more chickens in life??

During the weeks we’ve been busy with youth group, baseball practice, and spending time with friends. I’ve also planted my largest garden to date. Even though I still have a long way to go with learning the ins and outs of gardening, it is fun to see the produce starting to sprout. Yesterday I noticed 3 small watermelons growing on the vine and I’ve been picking cherry tomatoes almost daily this past week. P has started a side hustle of making soft plastic baits and already had a couple customers ordering custom baits from him. E decided he wanted to start taking gymnastic classes to help with speed and agility on the baseball field. Turns out, he really likes gymnastics and wants to continue taking classes. Fitting that into his busy schedule may prove challenging but we always seem to make it work.

We’ve been busy finishing up the Spring/Summer baseball season. At some point I may share the debacle of this travel ball season. But, for now, I’ll tell you it’s been like a Cinderella story. From March to May, the boys were so dejected and didn’t even seem to love playing in their tournaments. But, a change in our standings changed all of that last weekend. For the first time since February, they ended pool play as #1 seed. I can’t tell you how happy it made me to see them joking with each other, laughing, dancing and thoroughly enjoying the game of baseball! That meant more than a win in my book because at the end of the day they’re still 11-12 year old BOYS. Life is meant to have fun and the team bonding is what they’ll remember way more than the tournament wins/losses.

Although our Summer started out somewhat slow (ie not as much traveling), it’s starting to amp up. On Monday I told the boys that this would be our last boring week of the Summer. Ha! I’m so funny! We’ve had friends over, spent hours doing yard work, will be hosting a crawfish boil tonight and a baseball team fish fry tomorrow. And to top it all off, Rob and I are celebrating 16 years of marriage today.

I believe that this is only the 2nd anniversary that we haven’t gone on a trip or dressed up for a nice meal out. Instead we’re having friends over. But I’m thankful that we’ll be spending our anniversary fellowshipping with friends and family. That is what our life has become together and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

We are so blessed and I try not to ever take that for granted. I am so thankful for the people that the Lord has brought into our life these past 16 years. I am thankful for the highs and lows that have drawn us closer together. I am thankful for the 2 best boys that the Lord could’ve blessed us with. So much has happened in the past 16 years and I can’t imagine sharing this life with anyone else!

Busy Spring, Busy Life

 I always have the best intentions to blog regularly. But time gets away from me. We have been nonstop the past few weeks and I fall into bed, exhausted, most days. Rob traveled for work more than half of April. He drove the company mobile command center to linemen rodeos all over the South. His last lineman rodeo to judge was at home so P got to help him with it and I got to get a snip-it of what it was all about. I am so proud to be his wife for so many reasons. But, some of the times I am most proud of him is when watching him do what he loves- coaching linemen.

We have been doing all kinds of home improvement projects around the house. We got the exterior painted and rotten frame boards replaced. We got new carpet. We got a vapor barrier put in the crawl space. We are in the process of tearing down the dilapidated greenhouse and replacing it with a shop. Rob tore down the rundown "barn" (ie trailer) in the back of the property and I turned part of the area into a large garden. When we are not busy with baseball and fishing tournaments, we spend the weekends doing house projects. It's been a lot but I love seeing all the progress!

Speaking of fishing tournaments, P had a great Spring with fishing tournaments! He and his HS fishing partner won some money and finished 17th out of over 50 teams for the Central MS High School Bass Fishing league. He then fished a large tournament the first weekend of May with my father in law and placed third, where he won more money. The other night he said he wanted fish for dinner and we didn't have any thawed out so he walked over to the neighborhood pond, caught a couple, cleaned them and fried some bass for his dinner. Yesterday we went to my friend's pond and caught a couple before heading off to the ball fields. He fishes every chance he gets!

We are nearing the end of baseball season. We have 2 tournaments left and then are headed to the World Series. I am not a competitive person, but it has been hard watching E's team go from winning tournaments to struggling to even win a game. Yesterday the boys lost every game and didn't even seem to be enjoying the games, which broke my heart. Yes, I would like to see them win. But, I would also like to watch them have fun and bond. It seems like a different team from Fall and I don't know why. I have learned that baseball is such a mental sport and I can see some of the boys getting in their head and beating themself up for an error made. The idea of playing 3-5 games within 36 hours is a lot too and I have no doubt that the boys are worn out by the end of each tournament. But, I also know that these boys are fighters so they'll learn from it, get out of their head and get back to winning games like before. 

In about a week we will be adding a new addition to our family....Rip. After Fetcha passed away we realized how much Rebel missed having another dog around. And, in reality, we are a 2 dog family. I miss having a second dog around. So we will be getting a bloodhound puppy since Rob has wanted one for years. We haven't done the puppy phase in 5+ years so I'm not looking forward to that part. But, I know Rob and the boys (especially P) are excited to add Rip to our crazy life.

The boys and I are finishing up another school year this week. It's always such a bittersweet time for me. It makes me realize that time is a thief and our boys are growing up right before our eyes. (But, both boys finished the year strong with their grades and that makes me so happy!) It's a busy time and I feel like I'm being pulled in every direction. The students are over it and ready for Jr high, making the discipline part challenging. On the flip side of that, so many of the students have blossomed, matured and have become natural leaders. So I know they are ready to fly the coup and I can't wait to watch them soar!

As always, we have some fun Summer plans in store and lots of traveling will be done. I am looking forward to lazy mornings, drinking HOT coffee out of a mug instead of lukewarm coffee out of a travel mug. I am looking forward to not being on an agenda and spending quality time with the boys. I am looking forward to seeing family and making memories. I am looking forward to working on more home improvement projects. I am looking forward to all things Summer!

That being said, it is time to get ready for church. Thankfully today will be a lazy day spent as a family, one we all need. So until next time....

More Goodbyes

Every year seems to have a theme. Last year was teenage challenges. 2024 seems to be about saying goodbyes too early. We went to Texas for a few days of our Spring Break. We were having so much fun that, on the way home, we discussed taking a detour and extending our vacation. I'm glad we decided against it. When we got home we noticed that our sweet princess, Fetcha, was acting off. She was drinking a TON of water. As the night progressed she started getting worse. But, if you know Fetcha, you know she's been a fighter since the day she adopted us about 10 years ago. She left an abusive house to come to ours. She was hit by a car shortly after she adopted us and lived to tell the story. She has dealt with arthritis from that accident but didn't let it slow her down.

But at 4am on March 13, P woke me up in a panic telling me that Fetcha's breathing was off. She has been his dog from Day 1 and he had been up with her most of the night, comforting her and assuring her that we would take her to the vet as soon as they opened. However, she didn't live long enough for that to happen. Shortly after I got to her she had a seizure. As P and I petted her and reminisced about various memories with her, telling her she was about as perfect of a dog as we could've had and that she was so loved, she took her last breath and crossed the Rainbow Bridge. 

She had been in our lives for 10 years and we deducted that she was 13-14 years old when she passed away. For 10 years we loved her and gave her the best life possible. We laughed that she was more like a cat than a dog. She kept to herself unless she wanted a slice of cheese while I was cooking. At our old house, her favorite place was the picture window, where she would lie for hours, watching the boys play in the front yard. She would go lay on the bathroom mat every night and put herself in her crate promptly at 8pm every night. You could set your clocks to her. She didn't tolerate many other dogs but loved her brother, Rebel, no matter how much he annoyed her. 

Rebel has really grieved since Fetch passed away. We have taken him on more walks, have let him go with us whenever possible in the car (his favorite past time) and have spoiled him with Pup Cups from local coffee venues. But he was not meant to be alone. We're discussing getting another dog because we are a 2 dog family and because Rebel really misses having a sibling. We would never replace Fetcha and I don't know how we could even if we wanted to. She was close to perfect for us and was about the most low maintenance dog ever. She is missed daily, especially by her boy. But I am so glad that we got to love her for the past 10 years! Rest in peace, our princess. You are missed.

Travels

I do a lot of things wrong as a parent, but the two things I feel I excel at are making God a priority in our lives and making priceless memories as a family. The first one is pretty self explanatory: go to church regularly, pray, teach them scripture, tithing (where they witness it). 

But the second one is two-fold: I love to travel and explore new places. I want the boys to experience new towns, new states, new fishing lakes, new universities, etc so when they become adults and move out they have an idea of what is out there. We have been blessed to show them more states under the age of 16 than most adults have seen in their entire life. I want the boys to make an educated decision about what place best suits them to pursue their dreams. I don't want to hold them back or limit them!

The other reason I want to create priceless memories with them is because when Rob and I pass away that is what they'll think about most. Yes, we hope they'll wisely use their inheritance to better their lives. But, the memories will last so much longer! I often think back on the memories of my Nana and Papa, what fun we had together. They didn't have an excess of money (My Papa was a preacher and my Nana was a SAHM.). But they made the most of our time together by taking us to the beach, driving around their little town, getting donuts at a local diner, hitting the after holiday sales (still one of my favorite things to do), going to my Papa's church where he played the guitar and piano for hours. When our boys are grown, I want them to say, "Remember when we...." or "Wasn't that so much fun when....." or "That was one of my favorite memories together." To me, every dollar spent on these memories is worth it. I want the boys to have the best childhood we can possibly give them!

The other night, E said, "Mom, why don't you ever sleep? Don't you get tired?" I didn't know how to explain to him that I am exhausted almost every day of my life but that I wouldn't trade it for anything. I absolutely love being a mom to these two boys of ours (even when they bicker and drive me crazy). It is a blessing to spend time with them. A blessing to drive them all over town to get to their activities. A blessing to spend my "breaks" going golfing or taking roadtrips or going to eat at our favorite restaurants or going fishing or tossing the ball in the front yard with them. I try to lead by example and instill in them the importance of my time spent with them. So that when they are grown and have a family of their own, they can be hands-on parents as well.

Goodbyes

 In the South, they say if you eat cabbage and black-eyed peas on New Years Day it will bring money and good luck. I don't believe it. We are 11 days into the new year and 2024 isn't feeling very "lucky". (I know, Dad, that you don't believe in luck but just go with me for the sake of this blog.)

I'm sure no one truly likes funerals, but I avoid them at all cost. That's how much I despise them. But, despite despising them, I've been to some over the years. At my Papa's funeral, I remember walking to the church before his memorial and having a "quiet moment" (or 30) of grief in solitude. Then I don't remember much from his memorial because I shut down. I remember person after person coming up to me saying, "I'm sorry....." to the point that I wanted to scream if one more person apologized for me losing one of my all time favorite people in the world. To this day, I don't say "I'm sorry" to someone who has lost a loved one because of my Papa's funeral. As sad as it sounds, I don't remember any details from my Nana's funeral. I was with her when she took her last breath and I remember seeing a double rainbow right afterwards. I remember thinking that was the first time I had seen a double rainbow and it confirmed to me that my grandparents had been reunited. After that I don't remember anything. What I do remember is my last Thanksgiving with my Nana when it was just me and her and what a special time that was for us. I remember spending countless hours on the beach with her, looking for agates. I remember so much about the special times with my Nana and Papa that I guess it's not important that I don't remember their memorials.

Over the past 16 years, since my Nana passed away, I've avoided funerals. If I've had to attend one, I have gone through the motions with little emotion. Until 7 months ago when we buried a sweet boy from our school. I didn't know him well, but he had a big personality that everyone loved. I cried at his funeral. It's the first time I had cried at a funeral since my Nana's funeral. But today I went to a funeral that just about wrecked me. Today we honored the life of one of my precious 6th graders from last year. She died very unexpectedly and I have been grieving the loss of her life all week. Today at her funeral I was an absolute basketcase and I honestly don't know what I would've done if Rob had not been there. I have never been that broken at a funeral. I couldn't even look at the casket with that sweet girl's body inside because it was too much for me to handle. Instead, I buried my head in Rob's chest and sobbed uncontrollably. After the service, I held several of my students- past and present- in my arms while they sobbed. I have never had to bury a student I was close with and I pray that I never have to do it again. It was beyond awful!

Hopefully, the memories of her funeral will fade like they did with my grandparents' services and all I will remember are the good times with Corley. Even while I was getting ready this morning, I heard her voice say, "Mrs. Herrington, why don't you straighten your hair? I like it straight." During the service I got lost in the picture displayed of her on the screen and for a second I could hear her chomping the ice that was in the cup she was holding in the picture because she was always chomping on ice in my class. This evening I heard a sound and I thought of her infectious laugh. 

Corley was larger than life. She had more confidence at 12 than I probably have had in my whole life. She truly lived like no one was watching. She was loud and boisterous. She was giving and thoughtful. She LOVED bright colors and sparkles and dressing up. She was a friend to everyone. I sure am going to miss Corley Ann and I can't wait to be reunited with her in heaven someday, where she can teach me to love dancing and singing as much as she did.

Traditions, Birthday Fun and Loss

 I'll preface this by saying that I'm heartbroken as I write this so this may not be as cheerful as I'd want it to be. 

Traditions are important to me. I love our holiday traditions, starting at Thanksgiving when our elf on the shelf appears. He brings a lot of joy...and mischief....until Christmas Eve, when he goes back to the North Pole for the year. A few years ago the boys and I tried to accomplish 25 days of kind acts leading up to Christmas. We weren't 100% successful but one thing that we did, that the boys still enjoy doing, is "candy cane bombing" cars. Essentially, they put a candy cane on car doors in the parking lot. Then we sit and watch a few people come to their car, often smiling when they see the candy cane. On Christmas Eve we typically go to a service and then go look at Christmas lights. This year we didn't look at lights because I was in a funk and the boys said they don't like looking at lights anymore. But we still baked cookies for Santa and a birthday cake for Jesus. 

On Christmas morning we woke up early to open gifts then enjoyed brunch at my brother in law's house. Later that afternoon, my in-laws came over for dinner. It was a pretty low-key Christmas, which was just what I needed. The day after Christmas, P and I woke up not feeling well. I'm 99% sure mine was a sinus infection and we found out that P's was just a viral infection. But we spent about 5 days sleeping and watching football. We didn't get off the couch much. It was glorious...except the sick part.

Thankfully we were feeling better in time to celebrate E's birthday. He wanted to go bowling and then grill burgers and have fruit salad. For the first time in years, he wanted to have a big birthday party. So we didn't do much on his actual birthday.

Our Christmas break has been really low-key except for getting new floors. We had 2 days of "chaos" because of it, but it was well worth it! I am in love with our new floors and it made me realize how bad our old floors truly were.

Today has been hard, despite it being E's big birthday party. Shortly after waking up, I got word that one of my sweet students from last year died unexpectedly last night. It took me by surprise and absolutely broke my heart! She and I got close last Christmas because her little brother and E are good friends. She gave the best hugs and her smile was infectious. The only time I saw her being "down" was when she didn't get picked for the middle school cheerleading squad. But, in true Corley nature, she put her friends first and was excited for them. I was thrilled when she made the middle school dance team! She was always so positive and gave the best hugs. Today I had a splitting headache from trying to hold it together for E's birthday. I didn't want him to know about Corley until after his party. Thankfully I accomplished my goal and he had a lot of fun, despite the cold temperatures. He improvised on games because no one really wanted to go outside, but no one seemed to mind.

It's been a long day and I'm ready for bed. Tomorrow is the last day I get to relax before going back to work. I'm thankful for the time I've had with the boys and our restful break. 

Sweet Corley Ann....a beautiful life cut too short