12 Years and Counting

This past weekend, Rob and I celebrated our 12th anniversary. Since we don't usually do a lot of date nights, we go big on our anniversary. This year we opted to have a family weekend instead of an "us weekend". We did get to enjoy a dinner out, just the two of us, at Rob's favorite restaurant (Thanks, Mom and Dad, for paying for our meal!). It was so nice to get dressed up and just talk, take a walk down memory lane, and discuss how far we've come in our marriage.
We've come a LONG way! The first 7 years were pretty rough. We got into some monumental arguments. Sadly, I was ready to throw in the towel on more than one occasion and walk away from our marriage. But, then 5 years ago, we went to marriage counseling. While I don't feel we got a lot out of the counseling sessions per se, I think it both opened our eyes to some things. In the past 5 years we've learned to talk more and argue *way* less (in fact, I don't remember the last time we've gotten into a big argument). We put each other, and our family, first. We let the little things slide for the most part and focus on the positive things in our marriage. It's amazing how a little perspective and a huge attitude change can positively affect your marriage!
We had a friend over for dinner the other night and Rob said 2 things that I've really thought about this week. We were talking about the give and take in marriage. I said, "Sometimes it needs to be 50/50. Other times it needs to be 70/30." Rob replied, "I disagree. I think every day it needs to be 100/100." I couldn't agree more, even though sometimes that's not easy to accomplish. He was also talking about peaks and valleys. He said the more you put into your marriage on a daily basis, the less valleys there are and the more shallow they become, making it that much easier to get out of. What a profound thought that I couldn't agree with more! We've been there. We've seen our share of valleys. But because we have shifted things in our marriage and our priorities in life, our valleys aren't so deep. In fact, I don't think we've been in a valley in a very long time.
Our marriage is a blessing. I know that there are some people who probably didn't think we'd make it. And there was a time I would've agreed with them. But, over the past 12 years, Rob has become my best friend, my confidant, my supporter, my rock. I can't imagine being married to anyone else and I am so thankful we have this wonderful life together!