Thursday, May 13, 2010

Letter to Heaven

"Before Preston wakes up I can get a quick letter written to Nana," I thought as I stood at the sink, washing dishes. "I can tell her about how Preston is Personality Plus, making complete strangers smile every day. I can also tell her about how he likes to stick out his tongue and have me grab it. Oh, and then..." I stopped washing the bottle that was in my hand and stared out the window. I can't believe I let myself think I could sit down and write my Nana, the way I did 4 years ago when she was alive. There was a time when we'd write or email weekly, giving little updates on our lives. That was before the cancer took her from me.
May is a hard month because my mom, aunt and I walk the Komen's Walk in memory of my Nana... a strong opinionated pastor's wife that would make me peanut butter pies when I came to visit and would give the best foot rubs. I tear up thinking about the final breath she took four years ago Memorial Day weekend, one that I was there to witness.
My life has changed so much since that day. I've become a wife, a mother, have moved to a different state and have earned my Masters. I wish I could just sit down and write her a letter, telling her all about my life, Rob and her great grandson. But, I can't so instead I hope she's looking down on me, seeing how my life is turning out. I think she'd write me a letter telling me how proud she is of me. I love and miss you Nana!

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